The Phantom Tollbooth

When I was in the third or fourth grade, I was introduced to the Phantom Tollbooth. I loved the book so much that I took it out of the library to read it again and again. For some reason by the time I reached my 20s, I couldn't remember the name of the book or the name of the main character. I could only remember parts of the story. It drove me crazy for years. Then one day, I was driving out of the grocery store parking lot and it was as if an angel whispered in my ear 'his name was Milo'. I raced home and put "book with Milo" into my computer and it came straight up.

We were in the process of getting a puppy and I just knew that his name was meant to be Milo. I will never forget looking at his little face for the first time. I loved him instantly. Pure love. It was a moment like none other in my life.

He is 12 years old now. He has lost half of his teeth. He has cataracts and arthritis, and I think he is losing his hearing, but he wakes up every day thrilled to see me. He greets me and each new day exactly the same way. He is joyously happy to be alive and to love and be loved. He doesn't ask for much - some kisses and a little petting, a cool drink, a nice dinner and some cookies. He meanders around the yard exploring what the world has to offer. He naps a lot. My husband says that he wants to come back in his next life as my dog.

I realized recently that I wake up every day with the fear that he will have passed away during the night. Every single day. When I go to bed, I make sure that I kiss him and tell him I love him - just in case. As I write this, I know that the lesson of this relationship is supposed to be about living and loving in just this day. It is about waking up with joy to greet the people that I love. It is about keeping my expectations low and being content with a cookie and a nap. The irony isn't lost on me.

The Phantom Tollbooth is about an adventure. When I read the book what I loved about it was the adventure - so much so that I didn't even remember the name of the main character. I did not focus on what happens at the end or beyond. It was and is about the journey. Living and loving in just this day no matter what tomorrow brings.